


Lost and Found

by gibbsandtonysbabe



Category: NCIS
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Love, M/M, Male Slash, Oral Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-09
Updated: 2012-12-09
Packaged: 2017-11-20 16:10:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/587247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gibbsandtonysbabe/pseuds/gibbsandtonysbabe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The case they have been working hits Tony harder than he realizes and he looks around seeing similarities between himself and the victim. He's feeling lost and seeks refuge the one way he knows, wishing that he could have the one thing he truly wants. Gibbs sensing the angst plaguing Tony and watching him as he leaves the bullpen realizes he needs to step up to the plate. Finally finding Tony and hearing the deep seated emotions through the younger man's fingers he acts on his own.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lost and Found

**Author's Note:**

> I own nothing of NCIS and make no money.....a girl can dream though!
> 
> Much love to my most awesome Beta Amy!!!

Tony sat at his desk watching everyone around him. Tim was laughing at something Abby had said, Ziva was on the phone with the new man she’d been seeing for a while and Ducky was being loquacious as always and regaling Dornegat with another tale of his holidays as a young boy. 

 

He could feel the joy and happiness roll of them in waves, but it was unable to permeate the shell that had encased itself around him. The last case had hit too close to home and he was unable to shake it off and get back to his normal state of being. 

 

He identified too clearly for comfort with the victim, Sgt. James Morris. The case was solved and closed so he should have been able to back away and let it go. Instead, all he saw was his life following in the same path. The Sergeant had been discovered alone, dead in his home two days ago.

 

He had been dead for days and finally the stench of his decomposition alerted the neighbors. While Ducky tried to determine the cause of death, they had begun their investigation. Talking to all of his friends and they found that he was very well liked and respected but as was with life, they had all been so busy with their own lives, they hadn’t noticed that they had been out of touch with the Sergeant for any length of time.

 

One of his Marine friends had even stated that he had just seen him and then as he was forced to recollect, realized it had been three months ago. As Tony questioned the man he could distinctly recall the last time the gang had gotten together and that was seven months and three days ago.

 

Fuck, why did he remember that so clearly? It just served to make him feel even emptier. It’s not as if no one tried after that, they all did, but one person or another had a reason they couldn’t make it and after a while, it wasn’t worth the effort.

 

It was getting more difficult to keep up the jokes and stories at work so he stopped. It didn’t seem like anyone even noticed his silence and that to Tony that meant they didn’t miss him. Closing himself off to everything seemed the prudent route to go.

 

Tony wasn’t sure which hurt more, the fact that it wasn’t noticed or that he was comfortable with disappearing. Even if he had wanted to extrude himself from his, for the most part, self-imposed exile, he had no clue how to do that or truthfully if he even had the energy to care.

 

He wasn’t depressed as much as he was tired of trying, tired of pretending that his life was what he wanted it to be and most of all, tired of wishing for what could never be. 

 

It was the same story when they went to talk to the Sergeant’s neighbors. The man was always helpful and kind but no one could clearly remember the last time they saw him. No one remembered him not being there.

 

Tony was certain that it would be the same story if you talked to his neighbors. Mrs. Crawley would call him that nice young man that helped with her groceries, or Mr. Steven’s would remember him as the one who found his dog. But with the hours that he worked, in all truthfulness none of them knew him.

 

He would disappear from their memories quickly and never be spoken of again. He had experienced loneliness before, hell his whole childhood reeked of it. But this time it was different, he had friends and family and he felt more alone.

 

Throughout the investigation, Tony felt that his life was mirroring the Sergeant’s. He had friends, many friends but they all seemed so busy with their lives that they forgot to remember him. He didn’t begrudge them that, hell he was happy for each and every one of them.

 

Abby was dating Andy, a man that she met at a Habitat for Humanity build, McGee was seeing Elaine a fellow Elf Lord, Ziva dating Jerry who she met at her Synagogue, Jimmy was newly married. He could continue on naming all his friends and listing the things in their lives.

 

He knew that it wasn’t intentional that they were unable to get together for movie nights, bowling, drinks or for an impromptu dinner. Knowing that however did not ease the pang of loneliness that had settled heavy over him.

 

He had stopped asking to get together with anyone, not wanting to intrude on their lives. He went home to an empty apartment and fell deeper into an abyss he truly had no idea how to climb out of. He knew that he could still go to Gibbs’ house and certainly, he would be welcomed, but that was something he couldn’t risk. The man would be able to see everything in his eyes and that couldn’t happen.

 

He couldn’t lose the one constant in his life.

 

How could he look at the man and pretend he was just a friend? That act was getting far more difficult and the feelings were at the surface a great deal of the time. He wasn’t always as skilled at hiding the deeper emotions and the ones for Gibbs ran far deeper than anyone would ever guess.

 

Ducky ruled the death was a heart attack and he had passed quietly away as he sat in his chair. But Tony knew it was more than that even if no one else could see it. The Sergeant was in a chair, the lights, and TV off. It may have been a heart attack, but what killed him was the abject loneliness and emptiness. And the only thing Tony could focus on was the feeling that it would also happen to him.

 

He, too, would sit on his couch in the silence and darkness when the finality of it all would eventually crash down on him. Given the choice to go on and continue with the status quo or fall asleep and never wake up, he couldn’t honestly say he would chose to live.

 

Tony did not intend to kill himself; he just wouldn’t fight to stay alive. For what? Dreams that he couldn’t speak of, hopes that were dashed and a life alone? He knew that someone would inadvertently tell him that there was a whole world out there and he just needed to pick himself up by the bootstraps and carry on. Find true love and make a life.

 

Thing was, he had found true love and he desperately wanted to make a life with him. But that was the crux of that issue right there. He was too afraid to vocalize it and possibly lose having the man in his life in any capacity. Not to mention, that he had never wanted a man before. Was he gay? Bi? Not that it really mattered because through trial and error he knew that regardless of any label, the only man that he wanted was in fact Gibbs.

 

No one noticed that Tony did not talk about dates anymore, or that he never joined in their conversations. He disappeared before their eyes. There hadn’t been dates in years, since Jeanne actually. And not for the reasons anyone would have guessed.

 

The only good thing to come out of the whole Jeanne, La Grenuille debacle was the realization that he wanted a relationship, a real one. Someone to share life with, the good, the bad, the ugly and everything in between and he knew with whom he wanted that. And that only put his dream further out of reach and merely added to the desolation that had settled in his heart. 

 

There was no getting around it, denying it or wishing it would go away. He’d already tried all of that and finally had to accept the fact that he was hopelessly and irrevocably in love with Leroy Jethro Gibbs. He couldn’t remember when it happened or for that matter a time when he wasn’t. But nothing he could do would change it so he accepted it and locked it away; carrying on as though it didn’t tear at his heart and soul each time he nearly lost the man or when there was a woman in his life.

 

He knew that remaining at NCIS would be fraught with great difficulties but he couldn’t leave, the very thought of leaving brought him to his knees. So he continued as though life were grand until lately the façade was just too hard and painful to keep up and he withdrew. The Sergeant’s death brought it all up to the surface, along with the deep seeded fear he had of dying alone.

 

But, he’d already given up on sharing his life with the man he loved. After that, there really wasn’t anything else to fear or lose.

 

Tony shook himself out of his thoughts, finished his last report, and waited for the printer. He looked around again and was thankful Gibbs had a meeting with Vance. Everyone else was so caught up with his or her New Year’s Eve plans that he didn’t have to create an excited persona to hide behind because he didn’t believe he could find the energy or desire to do so.

 

Pulling the report off the printer, he signed it, placed it on Gibbs’ desk, and grabbed his stuff before he readied to head out.

 

Abby looked up for a second to ask. “You coming to my party Tony?”

 

Forcing a smile, he avoided her eyes. “Remember Abs, had plans and can’t make it.”

 

“Crap! Sorry Tony. Have fun and Happy New Year.”

 

“You too Abs.” Leaving before anyone could say anything else and desperate to get away, he took the stairs not wanting to chance the elevator being slow, and silently slipped out of the bullpen not noticing a pair of worried and concerned blue eyes watch him leave.

 

Gibbs had finished his meeting with Vance and looked down to watch his team. He smiled at Abby and Tim as they shared their latest escapades and at Ziva as he watched the soft look that came over her face as she spoke on the phone. He then turned to Ducky and Dornegat and quietly chuckled as he watched the look of wonder as the younger man listened to Ducky’s tale.

 

But when his blue eyes made it to the one that he searched for his heart shattered at the look of loneliness and desolation on Tony’s face and he would have given anything to change it. He wanted nothing more than to wrap the man in his arms and tell him that he mattered, that he was definitely important, not alone and very much loved. But he couldn’t and he wouldn’t risk losing the man that meant everything to him.

 

This was one time he was unable to get a clear read off of Tony and that frightened him. If there was a face made for joy and happiness it was Tony’s. But it had been so long since he had seen something other than sadness grace his features. 

 

He had noticed the man withdrawing and his silence and tried to reach out, but to no avail. It seemed that Tony was avoiding him as well. But he couldn’t ignore the look on that face or the sadness that filled those green eyes; he needed to be there for the man if only as a friend. 

 

It didn’t matter if he wanted more; he would shut that down and give Tony anything he needed to come back from the abyss in which he seemed to be lost. There had to be something he could do. He knew this last case hit the younger man hard. Gibbs thought back over the whole case and for a moment saw no similarities, nothing that seemed relatable to Tony.

 

That was until he looked down at the bull pen and saw the continued joy and animation on the rest of the team’s faces. They barely noticed Tony had left. Abby hadn’t given him a hug goodbye or bugged him about her party. He had so thoroughly removed himself that he was sure they were unaware that they had allowed it.  
But he also could see where Tony was coming from. With everyone having a significant other, he would have felt as though he was intruding or out of place, just like he did as a child. He identified with the Sergeant because he was alone and had no one. 

 

A clear picture of Tony came into his head and he didn’t like what he saw. He had tried to involve the younger man but easily gave in when Tony gave half assed excuses. He tried to remember the last time he had heard about one of Tony’s dates and he couldn’t. 

 

He still had his badge and gun with him, thankful for once, that Leon had wanted to see him immediately when he walked in the door. He quietly slipped out of NCIS without notice and hurried to his car intent on following Tony.

 

NCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCIS

 

Tony walked in his dark apartment throwing his keys on the table by the door and slumping down on the couch. He looked around and knew he had to get out of there, not that he had any clear idea of where he was going, but staying there was going to do no good at all.

 

He quickly showered and changed into black jeans and a black turtle neck. Grabbing his wallet, badge, gun, and keys, he headed out the door. He looked up into the dark clear sky at the stars and took a deep breath. 

 

He had known life wasn’t fair since he was a small child, but just once, he wished it could be. That he could look up at the stars and make a wish and that he would be found worthy of it being granted. That someone up there was listening and could see that he only ever wanted one thing, to be loved for whom he was, flaws and all. 

 

It was New Year’s Eve and he had no resolutions to make or break. And he couldn’t see the New Year being any different from the ones in the past. He only had one desire, one thing that he would ever wish for if wishes were even granted. Sighing as he looked at the twinkling stars, he whispered.

 

“I wish I were a child that believed in dreams coming true, that I could wish on a star and have that wish granted. There is only one thing I would wish for, only one thing that I dream of and I am certain that wishing on a star isn’t going to get me that.” He couldn’t fight the overwhelming feeling that he needed to speak the words out loud; to voice them and give them life. “I wish for Leroy Jethro Gibbs to see me as someone he could fall in love with.” He shook his head sadly, as he walked to his car and got in heading to nowhere.

 

NCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCISNCIS

 

Gibbs was pissed. Every idiot on the road seemed intent upon keeping him from getting to Tony’s. First, there was an accident and trying to avoid that wait, he detoured. Since then it had been one mishap after the other. Old woman crossing the road, delivery truck and it even seemed like animals had conspired keeping him from his goal. Finally reaching Tony’s apartment he sighed heavily when he saw the younger man’s car was gone.

 

He was ready to turn around, and go home when he felt something like a head slap and heard a voice telling him not to give up and act like a Marine. That if he wanted Tony, he was going to have to go after him and fight for him. Looking around, pretty sure that he was losing his mind, he shook his head to rid it of the voice. But it wouldn’t let go, nor did the need and desire to find Tony.

 

The feelings that washed over him once he truly acknowledged them were overwhelming having been kept hidden for so long. He sensed more than understood the need to find Tony was urgent and began driving all over, checking the parking lot of every bar he came across, in hopes that he would see the familiar car.

 

He drove around for what felt like hours and started to give up not having any real idea where he may have gone. Getting uncharacteristically turned around and lost he finally spotted Tony’s car in the parking lot of a non-descript club. The faded signage read ‘Lost and Found’ He parked and walked to the doors. 

 

Upon entering the club, he scanned the crowd and was disappointed that he hadn’t immediately spotted Tony. Standing at the bar, he ordered bourbon as he waited to see if the younger man would pop out of his hiding place.

 

As he sipped his drink, he heard a piano playing and the music captivated him. Allowing it to flow through him, he couldn’t help feel there was a story in it and closed his eyes to listen. He heard the notes tell of loneliness, searching for a place to belong and finally finding it. The joy was short lived as a loss was conveyed and then the music drifted to tell of a struggle to hang on.

 

Gibbs was drawn to and moved by the music in a way that he didn’t understand. The feelings that washed over him as the next notes flew from the piano were nearly his undoing. He felt the love so strongly in those notes; a love that was almost without hope of being returned. He looked for the source and finally saw the piano on a small stage. His heart stopped the minute he saw the man playing. 

 

Tony. It was Tony’s story that Gibbs was listening to and had stirred his emotions. He began moving towards the stage without any conscious effort. His heart was pounding as the unrequited love the chords were portraying ripped at his heart and soul. He wanted to cry out and tell the other man that it wasn’t true. 

 

The voice in his head screamed at him to do it, to take the chance to give words to all that he had hidden and buried inside; to see finally that he was not alone. That he could have everything that he dared dream and hoped for; all that he had years ago before it was taken away in the blink of an eye. All he had to do was open his mouth.

 

He continued watching and listening to Tony play, frozen to the spot out of fear and a great many more emotions. But as the music changed back to a hauntingly lonely crescendo he knew it was now or never. That if he didn’t speak now he would lose more than he could bear.

 

Tony sensing movement slowly came out of the haze his music wove around him and saw familiar blue eyes as he looked up. Before he had a chance to let the panic take over, he felt a calm settle over him, comforting him, and guiding him to look into those eyes. Hesitating briefly, he looked up, his green eyes meeting blue.

 

Tony was shocked by what he saw or at least imagined he saw. Not trusting anything yet, but a seed of hope blossomed as their gaze lingered and the reality slowly began to work through him, finally turning into acceptance. He knew without any doubt that their eyes were mirrors of each other.

 

Gibbs walked up to the piano bench and sat by Tony and breaking their gaze looked at the keys, running his fingers gently over them amazed at what they had earlier been able to convey with Tony’s fingers as the conduit.

 

Finding his voice, he spoke in barely a whisper. “That was beautiful Tony, but you’re wrong.”

 

Tony looked at him afraid to ask the question he so desperately wanted the answer to. “Wrong about what?”

 

Taking a deep breath and gathering his wits. “About the love being unrequited. It’s not.”

 

Tony’s mouth dropped open. “How did you know that was what I was saying through the music?”

 

Gibbs shook his head. “Not totally sure, but that’s what it felt like when it flowed into me. Your pain, longing, desire, need, and loneliness. It all spoke to me. And you are loved.” He was still scared to actually voice the words that were fighting to get out.

 

Tony was bolstered by the words but he needed more. “As a friend?”

 

“Yes.” Seeing the slight droop of the younger man’s shoulders, he knew he needed to say it and lay his heart bare. “But more than that Tony, I love you with everything that I have and everything that I am. I can’t begin to imagine you not being beside me and not being part of my life. I want more though Tony, I need more.”

 

Tony’s heart started pounding with the realization that he could have everything that he wanted, dreamed of, and hoped for. “So if I tell you that I love you and want nothing more than to go to bed in your arms every night and wake up still in them that is something you want as well?” The younger man smiled shyly.

 

Gibbs gave a full blown smile at his words. “That is exactly what I want and have wanted for a long time. Never thought you did or would.”

 

“Me either. Seems we were both to chicken shit to ask.”

 

They weren’t even aware that they were drawing closer to one another until they were sharing a breath. They never knew who moved first for the moment their lips met that was all each other knew. The feelings that had been bottled up rose to the surface and demanded retribution for being hidden. The need for each other became tangible as their hearts were beating in sync filled with love for each other and the desire that had been held in check for years demanded that it be known and was no longer going to accept silence.

 

So lost in one another as their love, passion and desire became so potent and demanded that it be fed, they barely registered the clock striking midnight and the voices shouting “Happy New Year’ as it came and went.

 

Finally separating for air they managed to gasp ‘Happy New Year’ to one another as the smiles and the emotions shining through their eyes said it all. Gibbs started to pull away thinking that they needed to take it slow and was going to voice that before he once again felt the head slap and heard the voice tell him that ten years was slow enough and he wasn’t getting any younger.

 

Taking Tony’s hands and lacing their fingers together amazed at how perfectly they fit together, he looked at the younger man. “Shall we take this someplace more private?”

 

Tony nodded barely able to find his voice. “I thought you would never ask. Or were going to tell me we needed to take it slow.”

 

“Thought about the slow part, not gonna lie, but it’s been ten years Tony, I think we’ve done slow and waited for each other to be ready. And honestly I am more than ready.”

 

Tony flashed that brilliant DiNozzo smile. “We know each other better than most people Jethro and have been through things together that strengthened the bond between us. Just because we were stupid and didn’t act on it, the bond has been between us since Baltimore. There are things we don’t know about each other I am sure, but we will learn and discover them.”

 

“I don’t know if I am going to be able to say this right…I have loved and wanted you for a long time, never thought that it would ever happen. Now you’re telling me I can have everything I ever wanted and though I am terrified of fucking it up, I don’t want to wait anymore. I want things with you that I never wanted with anyone. I want this year to start and end with us together and growing stronger.”

 

Jethro moved by Tony’s words grabbed the man’s face in his hands and brought their lips together in thunderous passion. The love that he felt came pouring out and he never wanted it to end. Moving his lips from Tony’s he traveled up to the man’s ear and whispered. “I want to make love to you.” Feeling the younger man’s body tremble at the words, he knew he needed to get them out of there.

 

“Come on. Let’s go.” Grabbing his hand, Gibbs led them both outside to their cars. 

 

Gibbs looked at Tony and decided to say it. “Drive to my house, I want our life to start there. I want the two of us to make it a home. I want that to be our home Tony.”

 

Tony smiled as he reached up and gently stroked Jethro’s cheek with his knuckles. “Sounds perfect.”

 

He gave Tony a gentle kiss before smiling and heading off to retrieve his own car, “Beat you there”. 

 

Laughing for the first time in longer than he cared to admit Tony answered. “I’m sure you will, but I will be there.” Getting in his car and closing the door smiling the whole time. As he drove to Jethro’s house, he was overwhelmed by the sheer bliss of just having admitted his feelings and the kiss that had transpired. As he pulled in the driveway, he couldn’t even remember the drive, he had been so lost in his thoughts.

 

Slightly nervous as he walked up the driveway, he took a deep breath, this was what he wanted for so long, and he was determined nothing was going to stand in his way.

 

Walking into the house, he felt like he was indeed coming home as he hung his coat up. 

 

“Jethro.” He called out as he stepped further into the house. Just as he was about to head to the basement a pair of arms wrapped around him and help him tightly. The warmth that filled him radiated from inside out as he felt a tender kiss to his neck and leaned into the touch.

 

Jethro turned Tony around in his arms so that he could kiss his lips again…it had been too long since he had and the craving that had been awakened demanded to be fed. Once was never going to be enough and he was certain that he was never going to get enough of the man in his arms. 

 

Tony moaned as Jethro began exploring every inch of exposed skin and it wasn’t long before both men needed far more contact and shirts were hastily and clumsily removed. Neither was prepared for the insatiable hunger that awakened as their bare chests met.

 

That fueled the fire already raging between them as Jethro began guiding them to the bedroom both men unwilling to let go of the other. As they reached the bedroom, Jethro’s hands worked the buttons of Tony’s jeans and pushed them to the floor, as his hands made their way back he gasped realizing there was nothing to stop his exploration. 

 

Caressing the firm globes of Tony’s ass felt like heaven and all he wanted to do was claim the man and make sure that everyone knew that Tony was his and no one else’s. Pushing their groins together and feeling the younger man’s cock through his jeans, he growled wanting more.

 

Removing his hands from Tony’s ass he practically ripped the button off his slacks as he struggled to get his pants off, he wanted to be skin to skin. Tony’s hand joined his and together his pants and boxers found the floor and as their cocks finally made contact eliciting sighs from both men.

 

The sighs turned into moans as they began to grind against one another. Jethro walked Tony back to the bed and pushed him gently down. Watching as the younger man laid down in anticipation, Jethro’s gaze traveled over the man. He openly admired his broad chest with its light covering of chest hair, the firm muscles of his abs that went to a narrow waist, the trail of hair leading from his belly button to the soft thatch of hairs at the base of the man’s cock which was jutting out straight and leaking. 

 

The cock was worth admiring as Jethro continued his leisurely perusal of the man before him, it was long and thick with a well defined head which was leaking pre-cum, and all he wanted to do was taste it.

 

Deciding that he had years in which he could admire the man it was time for action. Crawling up Tony’s prone body, he began to leave kisses from the back of Tony’s knee to his inner thigh ignoring his weeping cock for the moment.

 

He repeated the action with the other leg wanting to touch every inch of the younger man. He nibbled at the junction of each hip before dipping his tongue in the lightly furred belly button, eliciting a groan of frustration from the younger man. Continuing up his chest, he stopped at the first pebbled nub and gently pulled it between his teeth tugging at it.

 

Moving to the other nipple not wanting to leave it ignored, he quickly sucked it in his mouth as Tony arched into the touch. Making his way to the younger man’s jaw line he nipped gently until he reached the junction of his shoulder and neck, and bit down wanting to mark Tony, lay claim to the man. Tony gasped and writhed with need that was overwhelming his body.

Each touch and kiss was fueling the fire that was building to massive proportions. He felt like lava was flowing through his veins as his need built. He would beg for more if he knew exactly what he was begging for. All he was sure of was that he never wanted it to end.

 

Jethro marked the other side as his own needs were fighting for control, but he was not near done with the man beneath him and reaching his lips, he laid claim to them with a searing kiss that acted like gasoline on a fire that was already burning out of control.

 

Releasing his lips, he made his journey back down the younger man’s body with a trail of blazing kisses. As he reached the soft curls at the base of the cock, he nuzzled his nose into them inhaling the scent of the man he loved. 

 

Running his tongue all along the base of Tony’s cock and then swiping his tongue under and over his balls, was quite pleased when he heard the strangled moan from the younger man before wrapping his lips around the well-defined head and sucking.

 

“Fuck!” Tony gasped, his breathing labored and his hips thrusting upwards intent on having more of his cock in Jethro’s mouth.

 

Placing his hands on Tony’s hips, pinning him to the bed and ignoring the groan, he started to slowly slide up and down the long shaft. With each pass he went lower and lower until finally he took the entire length in his mouth, hollowing his cheeks and started a slow pace up and down Tony’s cock.

 

“Please. . . God Jethro…fucking feels so good…more. Please…I need more...” Tony managed to get out in between his gasps for air.

 

Giving in to Tony’s plea he sucked harder and began a frenzied pace up and down his shaft as he took the man’s balls in his hands tugging and squeezing in alternate motions.

 

“Jethro…I’ve got to cum.”

 

Jethro felt Tony’s cock harden and pulse as he came down his throat with a vengeance. His hips thrusting uncontrollably as his body struggled to come down from the intense sensation flowing through it. The older man continued sucking until the very last drop was released not wanting to waste any.

 

Releasing the younger man’s cock and climbing back up his body, he claimed his lips once more.

 

Tony pulled away and looked Jethro in the eyes, “Take me Jethro, please. Claim every part of me.”

 

Jethro reached over to the night stand and found a condom and the lube. Tony took the condom from his hands and looked at him.

 

Taking a deep breath before he spoke, “I don’t need this. I want to feel all of you. I have never been with a man and I want no one else but you.” Green eyes met blue.

 

Hoarsely Jethro spoke. “We don’t need it then. I only want you. No one else.” He tossed it across the room. Liberally coating his fingers, he nervously looked at Tony.

 

“I love you.”

 

“I love you too.” Taking the older man’s face between his hands, he saw his nervousness. “What? Don’t you want this?”

 

Jethro nodded. “More than you can imagine. Tony, I’ve never been with a man either and I want to do it right.” He shook his head. “That’s not quite right…but you know what I mean.”

 

Tony nods. “Do what feels right. It’s us and it will be perfect.” He kissed the man with everything that he had.

 

Jethro ran his lubed fingers over the sensitive area under his balls and gently grazed the tight ring of muscles with his fingers, playing them around the entrance with each pass giving a gentle nudge. Hearing Tony moan as he began loosening the puckered hole with his fingers, he got more turned on with every touch and sound.

 

Slowly sliding one finger in amazed at the heat that surrounded it he gently pushed it further into the younger man’s body sensing the acceptance as he carefully thrust it in and out and added another when Tony started to moan.

 

As he started to stretch the younger man in earnest he shifted his fingers and grazed what he assumed was his prostate and was astounded by Tony’s reaction.

 

“What the fuck was that?”

 

Grazing his fingers past it again causing the younger man to whimper and ride his fingers.

 

“Your prostate. Like that do you?” The pleasure that he begin to extract from Tony was making his need to fill him stronger than he could have ever imagined. The heat and tightness surrounding his fingers had his dick harder than he could remember and he truly wanted nothing more than to enter his body and feel that surround him. He was not sure he expected the intensity of his desires. He added a third finger wanting to ensure that he in no way caused the younger man any pain and honestly he was so turned on by him fucking his fingers, he was hard pressed to keep from cumming.

 

“Jethro…please...I...need you.” 

 

He looked at the younger man and knew he had never seen a more erotic site. The sheen of sweat that covered his body, rosy cheeks, hard nipples, his beautiful tight ass fucking his fingers and his cock erect and leaking again.

 

Removing his fingers, he generously lubed his own leaking cock making sure he gave it a hard squeeze wanting to hold off his own release for as long as he could. Lining his dick up with the ring of muscle he slowly pushed past it and paused giving Tony a chance to adjust to the intrusion as he slowly started to slide in inch by inch.

 

Overwhelmed by the intensity and the tightness surrounding him, he ran his hands up and down the younger man’s chest trying to ground himself. It felt incredible being inside Tony; he never experienced anything like that.

 

He felt unbelievably connected on so many levels and like he was finally home where he belonged. Wanting to say so much, he didn’t have any clue on how to begin or what to say. He had no words for the depth of feeling and emotion that were coursing through his body. 

 

Tony grabbed Jethro’s hand bringing it to his heart, letting him feel the pounding and as their eyes met, the words that were unable to come to Jethro’s mouth were clearly spoken through his eyes and the message was received loud and clear.

 

Leaning down to kiss the younger man, he began to slowly slide in and out of his body. Their lips met and it felt like a bolt of lightning flowed through their bodies as their connection deepened. They were joined on a deeper level than either man could imagine.

 

As Jethro increased his thrusts, their lips never separated neither wanting to let go; only doing so when it became impossible for them to breathe as their need for release beckoned. Tony’s cock was sandwiched between the two men’s bodies and their chest hair was doing amazing things to the sensitive skin.

 

“It feels so good Jethro…don’t want it to end.”

 

“Not the end Tony, only the beginning.”

 

“Oh God…I‘m gonna cum again.” Tony thrust up wrapping his legs around Jethro pulling him into his body deeper and trembled as the release flowed through his body between the two men. Jethro followed right behind as Tony’s muscles contracted tightly around his cock, his release flowing into Tony as he called out his name.

 

They collapsed together, struggling to breathe but unwilling to separate as the after tremors continued to flow through them.

 

Finding his voice Jethro spoke hoarsely. “Never have I experienced anything like that.” He kissed Tony gently as he moved to allow the man more air.

 

“Me either. I felt…connected is the best word for it and not the right one. Like we were one.”

 

Kissing the younger man’s sweaty temple Jethro nodded. “I know what you mean. Like coming home.”

 

Snuggling in deeper into the older man, “I love you.”

 

Jethro grabbed a shirt off the floor and used it to wipe their chests. “I love you. And just so you know, we are not hiding this, us. I waited too long for this and I refuse to keep it hidden.”

 

Tony smiled a very real smile. “Are you sure Jethro? Not about us, but the sharing bit.”

 

“Yes.”

 

Tony kissed Jethro’s neck and snuggled impossibly closer. “Happy New Year Jethro.”

 

Smiling and content, he pulled the younger man closer still. “It will be now Tony. Happy New Year.”


End file.
